In transition, that’s how I would describe my life right now. I’m preparing to close one chapter and open another and this transition is not going as quick or as smooth as I would like. I think my road to Uganda has a few bumps in it and it’s slowing me down! Or maybe I’m just impatient!
My house hasn’t sold yet nor has had any offers but it has only been a couple of months. In today’s market that is not much time at all I’m told. Selling a home is stressful though! I have to be careful to keep the house clean and clutter free at all times because I never know when someone may want to look at it. (I don’t think it helped when one day I accidently left the trash and bag of cat litter sitting in the middle of the kitchen. The smell was probably the first thing they noticed when they entered the house.) A nice clean house with everything in its place is nice but I think I’m much more comfortable in a little clutter!
I’m still working but employment could be coming to an end soon! I have mixed feelings about that. Financially, it would be beneficial to continue working until the house sells but if I’m not working my time would be freed up to concentrate on other things I need to accomplish before Uganda.
During my “transition” period I am trying to stay close to the Lord and in my Bible. In one recent study the word humble caught my attention.
Humble! Okay, what does it really mean? The definition in Noah Webster’s dictionary (1828) gives the meaning, when used as an adjective, as lowly; modest; meek; submissive; opposed to proud; haughty; arrogant or assuming. Alright, I see where I could have some work here. When used as a verb the definition is: to abase; to crush; to break; to subdue; to mortify; to make humble or lowly in mind; to reduce arrogance and self-dependance. “To reduce self-dependance”…umm..now I think I know why God is bringing this word to my attention?
In reading Deuteronomy, the word humble appears at least three times in Chapter 8. Moses is reminding the people of Israel all that God did for them while they were in the wilderness for 40 years and why they went through the difficulties they did. God was teaching the people to be obedient and humble. Verse 2 says “thou shalt remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee these forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart“.
God wanted the people of Israel fully relying on Him for all their needs. He tested them throughout their 40 years in the wilderness for obedience and to teach them humbleness so to protect them from pride. He wanted them to know that through all their trails; droughts, hunger, poisonous animals, He was there to supply their needs. God wanted them to be completely reliant on Him. When they came into the promised land and life started getting good it was important that they remember that the same God who provided for them in their time of need was also providing in their time of plenty.
Now, how does this apply to me? This chapter is about being obedient by obeying God’s commands; humbling ourselves before Him by knowing that all we have and all we need will be provided by Him; by knowing our hearts and no, not God knowing our heart (as He already does), but we ourselves must know what’s in own heart; and about being prideful by assuming that all our power, accomplishments and wealth was obtained by our own doing.
I think I see what the Lord is trying to teach me. I have had a pretty stable existence for a number of years with a steady income, a nice home, family and friends to always call upon when in need or just for fellowship, but this is going to change soon. Life may not be as stable and comfortable as it is currently and may soon become unstable and uncomfortable. Will I be ready for that? Will I be ready to rely on God 100%? It’s easy to say you trust the Lord to supply all your needs when you already have everything you need and the resources to get pretty much what you want.
As I wait for the house to sell, as I wait until I’m told I’ve collected my last pay check, as I continue to build my support team and as I wait until I can buy my plane ticket to Uganda I will work hard to learn these lessons of obedience and humility. I will ask the Lord to “prove” me and I will search my heart so that I will be prepared and ready to fully depend on the Lord.
Nancy
This is a great blog entry !!!!!!
I really enjoyed reading it !!!!!!
Cathy